Be a Good-un

Be a Good-un

I’ve been giving some thought to the desire to…

Help Wanted. Huge Reward.

Help Wanted. Huge Reward.

…help Someone Reach their Dreams.

What does this really mean? It’s not a collection of merit badges– not for show anyway–but at the end of life how much cooler would it be to have a house full of thankful people rather than a house full of stuff?

But which dreams?

I’m not necessarily saying you should fulfil your son’s dream by building a life-size Millennium Falcon in your backyard. Although cool, (see below) it might be more rewarding that you throw a ball with him every night as he dreams of playing in the NFL. It’s not the point of him making it to the NFL that counts, but rather someone he looks up to believing in him and actively engaging and spending time nurturing his dreams that truly matters.

Help Defined

“to give or provide what is necessary to accomplish a task or satisfy need; contribute strength or means to; render assistance to; cooperate effectively with; aid; assist:”

So we come alongside our child, friend or acquaintance to add support and help them reach their aspirations or goals.

As with any dream, “a failure to plan, is a plan to fail.” A simple way to get started in the right direction is as follows:

  1. Define the Goal or Dream – Who, What, When Where, Why How. Write it down.
  2. Set a time frame – Set manageable and realistic goals to gauge the process.
  3. Visualise your dream – put meat on the bones. Where do they see it in five years?
  4. Involve Others with similar goals  – Multiply your brain power and passion.
  5. Meet regularly to make sure you’re on task or need to adjust the plan.
  6. Stick with it and have fun.

When someone does not want to be helped.

It’s hardest, especially with loved ones, when you see their potential and watch them turn away a helping hand. We see this a lot with teenagers or those still thinking like one. The key here is not to give up. Just be patient and make sure you are there when they are ready.

Now if it’s your 25-year-old, who’s still thinking he is going to become a pro-baseball player but can’t throw a ball, then help them by being honest. Not mean, but constructively objective by offering encouraging advice. Don’t ridicule their dreams, instead work on this opportunity to guide them toward new ones.

Yesterday, I was at Target and was approached by an extremely nervous man asking for help. We have all had that moment involving the stranded family with no gas/rent money, etc, where it’s very easy to walk away. But sometimes, it just feels right to give. The interesting part of this story—as cash often can be in short supply—is when I got home, I found a blank envelope inside of my mailbox with twice the amount of cash in it that I had just given earlier.

So get out there and be Good-uns and do good stuff this week.

All the Best,


P.S. You can find your “Falcon” plans here…


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About author

Thom Slade
Thom Slade 272 posts

“Healing for the broken hearted. A map, guide and community to move on positively/fantastically in life with a healthy beaming smile”
Thom. Thom is the originator and alter-ego of Divorce Survivor, Single Parent, and now moving on to new adventures in Life. Follow his journey here every week, or on Instagram and Facebook.

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  1. Bobby de Ortega
    February 17, 18:59 Reply
    Thom, You've made some really good points here, especially with regard to spending time engaging and building people (and their dreams) up. What better reward than better relationships with better human beings? Although, I will ask, where, pray-tell, is this magical neighborhood of yours where random envelopes of cash are finding their way into your mailbox? Clearly I have some packing to do. Ha ha! Thanks for the great post.
    • Thom Slade
      February 17, 22:15 Reply
      Its a Thom-ism. Or as JT put it... "what goes around, comes around" But seriously, what hit me with this particular gentleman was his nervousness/desperation. He was clean well kept and embarrassed. I remember cutting off as he pulled out his drivers license, and I told him that it was OK. I was going to give him something whether he was telling the truth or not. I then told him I was a single parent, and it would be on his own conscience. He then tried to give me the money back...
  2. Aundie Donohue
    February 17, 20:18 Reply
    I agree with you both! What big hearts the two of you have (Goldie Locks and the Three Bears style. :P) I have yet to experience a greater reward on this planet that helping other humanoids in times of need or when trying to process their great big beautiful plans and dreams! Thanks for reminding and sharing, Thom!!! P.S.. And don't forget... I know where you live! :D
  3. craigbic
    February 23, 12:37 Reply
    As the father of four kids who is also starting to move on from my divorce, I can safely say I've seen a lot of my own dreams shattered or fallen off by the wayside. That said, I can also safely say there is no greater reward then helping others to achieve their dreams, especially when it's your children. They don't always want your help or guidance but with perseverance and a little luck, you can help them succeed.
  4. Chris
    February 25, 12:57 Reply
    Having a dream is important, having someone who supports that dream is more important, but having someone who will sit down with you and plan out that dream and help you find ways to achieve it is completely invaluable! I think there are a lot of people who can tell you that they support your dreams, but there are fewer people who are willing to help you make it a reality. The world needs more of the "good-uns"!

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