Divorce Crossings

Divorce Crossings

Picture this… an adventurer, trying to cross raging rapids on a suspension bridge, as mid-crossing the gale force winds snap the cable tumbling out hero into the deadly torrent…

Keep Crossing

Keep Crossing

Which is exactly what happened to me this weekend except instead of a whip I was holding a glass of wine, and well, the wind was less torrent-y.

It’s funny how we like to plan everything, our work, our play, and our coordinated socks.

I’m a planner.

I can’t move through the day without creating a list of things to do and accomplish. I wake up and start that day’s list and keep a larger multi-page secondary list for life, the universe and anything that can’t be accomplished that day. It goes without saying that it is a long list.  Am I the only person that LOVES to cross out things on the days todo list? I don’t think so. But crossing out on the long list gives me butterflies.

Now, before you jump to false conclusions and surmise the reason why I’m divorced, and still single… it is not the fault of the lists (I’m pretty sure anyway?) as  they work. They make sure things keep moving in the right direction, and I’m fun enough to sometimes live “off” the list. So Thom I hear you say, we understand you like lists, but so what…

Life as a metaphor

Crossing the bridge to journey to the other side.

I often feel that life is a series of bridge crossing. A journey from something comfortable and known, to something unknown. The bridges sometimes can seem flimsy and are suspended high over shark infested waters. Going through my divorce I felt like I was leaving the safety of what was known over to something unknown. And even after the crossing it seemed like I couldn’t settle too long as the water began to rise and I  needed to press on with the journey to find my new dry land. As scary as these crossings can seem, it’s still better to move forward than live with the “troll” under the bridge (metaphor/humor…).

This is at the core of why we started IMO, to be there for each other. To share uplifting and positive stories to help others on their  journeys. Have a question?  “Ask Thom”. The team and I love to hear from you, and will do whatever we can to help you on your travels.  Like the sailors of old, terrified of sailing of the “edge” of the world, we are here to help you traverse to new horizons, sunrises and some sad sunsets. But know each foot across the bridge is one closer to a new adventure.

The cuts and bruises of life learning experience

My fall this weekend was not graceful. One minute I was standing on a firm and solid bridge, the next I was underwater.  Which was another lesson.

  1. Look where you are standing. On a wet bridge after a torrential downpour over a flash flood. Sometimes in life we are just not smart. Get off the bridge. Get going. Keep moving.
  2. Don’t over think it. Something’s will correct themselves on the journey. On, my journey down, my reflexes kicked in to somehow grab the bridge wire and pull myself in. I didn’t think about it. I just did it (I also surfaced still holding the crystal wine glass… it was my mother in laws…)
  3. “No Pain no Gain”. Complete B.S. Nobody goes into a breakup looking to come out with abs. It should be “through pain you can personally gain”. Look at where you are positively in the fact that it’s a starting point to a new beginning. I came out of the water bruised and bleeding, but my kids had been on the same bridge only minutes before and we are all safe and sound.

So stay dry, keep moving and don’t be scared of the crossing.

Love Thom

P.S. I love to hear from you. Please comment or send me an email at thom@ivemovedon.com

Or create your own bridges!
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About author

Thom Slade
Thom Slade 274 posts

“Healing for the broken hearted. A map, guide and community to move on positively/fantastically in life with a healthy beaming smile”
Thom. Thom is the originator and alter-ego of ivemovedon.com. Divorce Survivor, Single Parent, and now moving on to new adventures in Life. Follow his journey here every week, or on Instagram and Facebook.

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