The Importance Of Spending Time Alone
I happen to think that it’s very healthy to spend time alone. After divorce, you need to learn how to be alone and that you’re not
defined by another person.While this isn’t always the easiest concept to grasp at first, once it’s realized and embraced it can become one of the most valuable self-healing tools there is. When you’re married, you don’t really realize how much time you really spend with your partner and even a person who thinks they’re capable of being on their own can find themselves struggling to cope with how different it is without their spouse around.
In the beginning, your friends and family are going to want to do everything they can to help you through such a difficult time. Divorce is life altering and usually the best medicine is to surround yourself by the people that truly care about you. Having that kind of support network is an amazing thing at first, but you can’t allow yourself to be crippled by it because it’s extremely easy to turn your loved ones into a security blanket to keep yourself from truly moving forward.
Learning to embrace alone time takes practice and while you might want to pick up the phone and call someone to rescue you from the solitude, you need to resist. One of the easiest ways to do that is by distracting yourself with something you like to do, not necessarily something you need to do.Folding laundry or cleaning out the fridge will keep your mind off of your loneliness for a while, but instead try scheduling some time for a good book, exercise, or pick up a hobby that you’ve been interested in. Don’t hold yourself back with excuses, just do it.
Eventually, you’ll start to cherish your time alone and realize how much more of an independent person you’ve become in the process. Your mind won’t constantly be racing, thinking about the past and that deep breath you take won’t be because you’re trying to chase away your personal demons… it’ll be because your content with your situation and yourself.
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